Tag Archives: faith

On Church Productions of any kind.

Here are three aspects or possible goals of planning/creating a production at a church:

  • Entertain people in your church congregation and your community.
  • Evangelize those outside Christianity among your community with the gospel.
  • Involve more members of your church in ministry to build community.

Your only chance of success with the production is to choose two of those and focus on making them happen.

Your best chance of success is to pick one.

Perhaps this needs more elaboration, but for now, I had to get this concept written down.

Thoughts?

On the first essay in “Love and Living” by Thomas Merton

Disclaimer: I don’t disagree with Merton, nor is this an attempt to bash him at all. Merely my thoughts on the essay…

He seemed to make two points…

First, He likens the university experience to a monastic one, and I would concur. He also talks about how those two experiences are more about self-discovery than learning things, which I also agree with… but he describes self-discovery using a LOT of vague ambiguous philosophical terms like, [my very loose example/paraphrasing]:

Finding yourself isn’t finding yourself but finding the self that finds your self, and really that’s God finding your self for you and that you don’t actually “live” until that moment occurs unless you would describe that moment as yourself discovering you, which negates the self-discovery. And the whole finding yourself thing is really a single spark, a single moment in time, [which i actually do disagree with; I feel it's a process]

Also, the whole success thing he touches on… He stresses that we should reject success, but fails to define it, really. It seems the idea of “success” that he is rejecting is that which was allegedly put forth by some of his university experience, which was to get a high-paying job and be seen as very important to society… which in most respects I agree is not important to pursue in one’s own life as success. However, “success” is “the accomplishment of an aim or purpose”, which paints a very apathetic view of life wherein he is intentionally “running away from any success” as
I believe he puts it. To work toward failing every aim or purpose you ever have in life. Keep in mind the unhealthy definition of success I described earlier, he really never mentions or gets into, only stressing that he doesn’t want and even avoids “success.” He also tries (poorly, I feel) to stress that he is not saying that his unsuccess idea is his way of undermining the success concept (“winning by refusing to keep score”). I guess he spends a lot of time stressing what seems to be a fairly recognized truth among anyone who would be reading his book anyway. That being, “success” in life should not be about this ambitious, capitalistic, self-aggrandizement.

It wasn’t bad. Just, for the verbosity he chose to use, I expected more truth.
I am confident his subsequent essays will have more to learn, love and live from/in them.

“It doesn’t hurt at all, just kinda numb.”

how do you judge what you believe?

Like, how do you test the things you believe? or… like… Hope?

Hope is only proven right or wrong by the results, right? Did what you hope for happen? Is there a time limit  on it at all?

I am trying to remove hope and expectation from my life. Thus far, they have only disappointed. In my experiences in life, I have learned not to hope. Not saying it’s wrong or unwise for anybody to hope, only that what other people have told me about hope does not stand the test of my own life experiences. And at this point, my life experiences are holding more authority. I’m trying to avoid hopes, dreams, expectations, because it only serves to remind me what has not happened, and what is unfulfilled about my life.

One day at a time, Drew. just try to be kind and be wise. That’s really about all I can figure at this point.

I would say I’m hoping that something good will come of it, but really, I’m not. If something good happens, then good. If not, then oh well, at least I’m not disappointed. Rejection is a powerful deterrent to hope.

I’m trying not to sound depressed, because that’s not exactly what’s happening here. There is a certain amount of… sobriety in realizing that hope disappoints. There is certainly a hole in that part of my mind/heart that had been reserved for such visions and dreams and planning. I will fill it with something less intense I’m sure.

But, I won’t constantly be worried and stressed about how my life is not meeting these expectations I have of it. Love? The Payoff of Persistence? Career Path working out? For me, they have been unreasonable. But now, no problem.

There is a second thing working in my head. Peace with God. I strive to find it… Some days I feel like I might have it, most days, nothing. I’ve realized some things about feeling peace with God/right with God/righteousness/loved by God/anything like that; First, it’s been scarcer than… a moderate or liberal Rush Limbaugh fan, and second, it hasn’t been dependent on any of my actions or lifestyle choices. Prayer Life, Money, Lust, Pride, Gluttony; None of this has had a real effect one way or the other…

And most all of my life, I have been taught that these morals, these idioms, these paradigms of rightness; They are WORTH living by because of the benefits they bring, most notably: peace with God and peace with man… And while I have seen the latter to be somewhat true to an extent, I haven’t seen the former. Or rather, it has not been my experience that those paradigms and morals are what leads me to experiencing peace with God. I’m really really growing weary of standing up for and fighting to maintain and live by these paradigms and morals when for me, they’re not based on or backed up by own life experiences. I don’t feel peace with God when I decide, again, not to get drunk, or not to hook up with a girl, or whatever other vice it may be. When I resist temptation and choose wisdom, I don’t feel close to or loved by God.

On the other hand, I feel terribly when I do make mistakes, but mainly because I am letting down the expectations of my community… I don’t feel convicted from God. I don’t feel ANYTHING from God one way or the other. But I do feel bad that I let down the people in my life who believe me to be a better person than that.

I really really want to believe that what I have believed for so long is true. I just want to be able to say that I know it’s true because I have experienced it in my own life.

Does anyone relate to any of this?

Jordan was right. This is worth reading.

I mean, do you really expect a 20-something to give you time-tested spiritual advice about the world? There’s no truth in that. Go read a book that’s not a best seller and go talk to someone that’s three times your age. You’re dying every second – you might as well learn how to do it gracefully from someone who’s been dying a lot longer than you.

via Ending The Letter: Rant: Your spirituality sucks..

i’m at cc.

For an idea of how I feel like right now, listen to “Time to Pretend” by MGMT while reading The Lord’s Prayer aloud. That’s the battle in my mind/soul.

Is it weird to want to rid of myself of purity for the purpose of not worrying about it?

How do you mud wrestle in an all-white tux and not get dirty?

I know this one Guy, s’posed to be be the best at getting stains out.

Friday night I experienced some new environments. I was pleasantly surprised at some parts, and not surprised at all by others.

Saturday I spent at the beach with people I love and who love me. The beach always leaves me refreshed and contemplative. I felt the inklings of a desire to… more actively engage/embrace/figure out my faith.

For the last two years or so this has always meant starting with The Lord’s Prayer. I can’t explain why completely, except that many times I have no idea what else to pray, and that is the most sure, true, simple thing I can think of as a starting point. It has always meant a lot to me in that respect.

Sunday I played drums at church. It is a uniquely satisfying experience. Then Mike Patz serendipitously decided to pray the Lord’s Prayer. Strike One.

Had a great lunch with Glenn. Remembrance. I spent a lot of time that day reflecting on life.

Sunday Night I watched The Soloist. What an amazing film. More amazing than the story of commitment, community, friendship, love was the moment closer to the end of the film that finds a major character emotionally reciting the Lord’s Prayer, slowly, intentionally. Strike Two. I went to bed, unsure of what steps to take ( I know what hasn’t worked and what I DON’T want to be like) but not willing to throw out the baby with the bathwater.

Monday Morning. I sit down at work, open my email, where I receive a Daily Text from the Moravian Church, just a couple of quick verses and a short prayer for the day; I highly recommend it, by the way. Many days it’s the only Bible I get.

Today, for the first time ever in these emails, the prayer was, indeed, the Lord’s Prayer.

Strike Three. Now what?

I don’t know, but I’m hopeful.

“Seek not to understand that you may believe, but believe that you may understand.”

Saint Augustine